Yesterday was tough. We had no choice but to put down our beloved dog, Spade. He had lost the use of his hind legs and couldn’t stand up anymore. He shook uncontrollably. On our last trip to the vet she discovered he had a heart murmor. The vet had hoped that he had arthritis and that medication would work, but it didn’t, and he would have needed thousands of dollars of tests and surgery to even find out what it was. It was time, hard as it is for everyone.
Obviously this was hard on Tracy and the kids, as Spade has been a member of the family for a very long time. He was the best dog I have ever known. When I went to pick him up to take him to the vet I was going to try my best to hold it together, but, as soon as I opened her front door he came falling down the stairs to me, his usual excitement to see me but with no use of his back end. It was so sad.
The trip to the vet was difficult because he kept pushing his head under my arm, as he always did when you weren’t paying quite enough attention to him. The tongue was going and the tail was wagging as always. He had that usual enthusiasm that his "Daddy" was taking him on yet another adventure. Thankfully he didn’t know this was our last trip. Driving is very hard when you’re eyes are filled with tears, as is typing.
When we got there the vet came out to help me get him out of the truck and carry him in. For the very first time ever he didn’t want to get out of the truck. It’s like he knew, which was really hard. The vet took him into a room and laid him on a blanket and I did the paperwork. My last moments with him was watching him trying to come to me and falling down, and shaking uncontrollably. As horrible as this was I had some strength in knowing that we had made the right decision. If there had been any doubt that he could be cured, the guilt in putting him down would have killed me. Seeing him like that convinced me that there was really no other choice. I couldn’t bring myself to stay and left before I completely fell apart.
As I drove away memories of all the great times with my Spade came flooding back. He was a wonderfull dog who will be sorely missed by everyone whose life he touched.
Goodbye My Spader. Rest In Peace boy.